2. Encumbrance..

Evening Blog, how have you been?

I've been wanting to write to you about a subject that's been on my mind for a while now, I feared that it may seem to melancholic for our third communication, but I really need to express this. 

Pressure. There comes a time in everyone's life where we feel the pressure of a situation. Of course it's how you deal with such a thing that allows for personal growth and a better understanding of oneself. But there are many kinds of pressure, Blog.

Can you narrow them down and categorise them? Is it even possible? Does it follow the simple "fight or flight" model? 

Some people thrive off of the stuff. It's when they can truly show that they can preform on top. I know this because I have had some of my greatest moments in work due to the sheer amount of extra pressure on the task given. The problem I have is, it is not as consistent as I would like. One person's defining moment is another's downfall, but why? Yes, I know we are all different, and that is one of the joys of humanity, but when does pressure become a burden for someone? Is it solely a variety in skill, or is there something deeper like an emotional connection?

There have been a few instances in the past few years of my young adulthood where the pressure to preform in a task has been so difficult,making it feel more like an incredible burden than an amazing opportunity. I find that when I'm questioning myself as to why this is, instead of assessing my skills and looking for a way to improve, I compare myself to those around me, those that have achieved what I want without it feeling the heaviness that I did. I should be where they are. I should be just as good as them, but I'm not.

But why Blog? Why am I comparing myself to others?

Do we crave acceptance from others? That if we can handle what they can, we're in? As a society, we love to compete to be the best and have the best. No one really tells you though that with it all comes the pressure of keeping it and staying at the top. I compare so that I know what I have to strive for, that soon I can be great like those around me.

The definition of pressure is the amount of force applied on a object. Straight away, in that little sentence, you can screw yourself over. You already have the force of the situation, then force yourself to preform better with a little 'healthy' competition and then if you add the force of the comparison that someone, somewhere has done it better than you and the odds are quite simply against you. Fight or flight. The way I see it, the more you burden yourself with pressure the less likely you are to truly emerge triumphant. It's an exponential graph of doom.

And we still fall for it. 

I suppose the reason why I sometimes compare, is that I can't stand the thought that if somebody has done better than me in the exact same situation that they somehow now, have to right to judge me on how I handle it. 

Do you ever feel like that Blog, or is it just me? 

Till later...